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June 3, 2009
How to put (fat) asses in the seats.
BK Homman and I caught the Dodgers-Diamondbacks game on Monday night. L.A. tried to make it interesting in the bottom of the ninth, but still managed to lose to one of the weaker teams in baseball.
The game wasn't action-packed, but our seats were very good and that made it well worthwhile. The Dodgers claimed an attendance of 32,304, which as you can see from the photo above proves that their front office is full of lying liars.
Little did I know that L.A. Times columnist Steve Lopez was at the game as well, in much worse seats but with a better story. He was hanging out in the right-field bleachers, where the Dodgers offer an all-you-can-eat ticket for $25.
Lopez reports from the scene of the crime:
Daniel Tzec, a Pomona housekeeper, had eaten six hot dogs and one order of nachos by the second inning. He also had quaffed three beers, which cost extra, unlike sodas or water. Tzec looked like he was running out of gas, but he insisted otherwise."It's just a little rest," he said, and he may not have been kidding. Four more dogs, on very short leashes, were cradled next to him on a cardboard tray.
As I talked to Tzec, I began questioning my support for universal healthcare. Do I really want to take on the burden of medical care for someone who's inclined to eat six hot dogs in two innings? According to the Farmer John website, a Dodger Dog has 240 calories, 200 of them from fat, as well as more sodium than the Salton Sea. Do you get a souvenir defibrillator with your 10th dog?
...[Paul] Galle, a schoolteacher from Chino Hills, explained that he gets the maximum allowable four hot dogs on each trip to the concession stand, then throws away two of the buns and stuffs the extra dogs into the remaining buns. With less bread, he's able to eat more meat.
Galle has it down to a science at the condiment station, where he nimbly makes the dog transfer, tosses spare buns, and loads up with ketchup, mustard and relish.
"That's unfortunate," he said as one bun split under the weight of two dogs, and he substituted with a backup bun.
In Dodger Stadium, a bleacher of girthly delights (Steve Lopez, LA Times)
